My arm hurts. Wanna know why? Of course you don't, but I'm going to tell you anyway: I'm stressed. And when I'm stressed, I need to do something physical to let out all the steam. This physical activity, which has my right arm sore as H-E-double-hockey-sticks, started out as lightly skipping stones across a miniature pond, and turned into launching fistfuls of rocks angrily at the water, then (because I didn't want to have to mow over all these rocks when the water disappeared) targeting the tree trunks on the outer edge of the woods, instead. Sad thing is, I didn't even know I was stressed. My simple, supposed-to-be-calming, rock-skipping activity turned into a full fledged attack on the trees and anything else I could hit (which, sadly, wasn't much). I nearly started crying, and I don't even know why. I guess I'm so stressed because of all the things coming up: Speech meet this weekend, and my duet partner and I haven't practiced since the last speech meet, which was like, 3 weeks ago... Um, let's see... ACT Academy (class that helps you prepare for the ACT) starts on Monday and goes until April 5, then April 9 is the test day... Also, freakin' Talent Show tryouts are on Monday... Quizzes in Spanish and English tomorrow... Drama class crap to try and remember to get started on... Teachers witching about Girl's State and Law Cadet interviews, both of which I don't really have an interest in, even if it does look good on college applications... Geez, I'm going to have a meltdown just typing about all this stuff...
I miss the summer. Summertime is less stressful. Sure, I have work, but at least the stress is kept down to minimum, there. In school, it's an everyday occurrence. However, I had a highlight to this week. Lemme tell you about it...
It was Monday, Valentine's Day. Now, I know I said I hate Valentine's Day, but this one was different. It was going pretty much like it goes every year: I got a few candies from some friends, and then the Student Council members handed out the carnations that you could buy for other people, and I got one from Tanner. The surprise didn't come 'till the last bell of the day rang, and I opened my locker. There, sticking out of a vase in my backpack, was bouquet of seven roses; there were two white ones, two red ones, and three black/white ones, with unbloomed lilies mixed in, and what looked like tiny apple blossoms scattered all around in it. A red envelope sat right next to it. I opened it, and the first thing I see is the cover, which said: "If I had a flower for every time I thought of you, I could walk in my garden forever." A quote from Alfred Lord Tennyson. Inside said, "What a perfect day for me to tell you I love you," plus a personal message from Tanner, but I'm not going to put that up on here. Ah, excuse me, it's making me tear up again.
Anyway, when I pulled out the bouquet and vase, and read the card, it made me want to cry, and when nobody was around, I did cry. It was a mixture of sadness and happiness, but mostly happiness... I had never gotten roses before, except for one time, when my dad bought me a pretty yellow one... I was surprised to find the black roses in the bouquet. It was only earlier that day, when Tanner and I were talking about flowers, that I mentioned I loved black roses. Later on, I found out that he called and had the black roses added in. He also said the lilies were supposed to be orchids, because I had once said I liked orchids, but they didn't have any... I can't believe he remembered that orchid thing... That was another thing that made me cry: Nobody else ever remembers the little things I say... Like, that I like the color green, or I love orchids, or black roses... Or that I love the smell of books, the scent that their pages give off... Or that I hate coloring pictures that I draw, and I only like using pencils when I draw... Or that I was born at 12:17 am...that I like songs without words, and I like to create little movie scenes in my head to put with those songs... that I love water, but I'm scared of drowning, and I can't not hold my nose when I go underwater... not many people remember the little things... But Tanner does...
... This is Maximum Sunshine, signing off... Αντίο και ο Θεός ταχύτητας...
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