Fight-or-Flight of the Buttered Popcorn

   Maybe there's a good reason I never eat popcorn, except when I go to the movies (which is hardly ever).
So I'm just sitting here, feeling hungry, and I get a sudden craving for popcorn.  Now, I love the heavily buttered kind, like at the movies, when nearly every piece is a golden buttery color.  Well, my mom buys the buttery kind, but apparently, I didn't think there was enough butter.  Or salt.  So I take this spray butter that we have and saturate my popcorn in it, and then I pour about 1000 tons of salt on it... If I keep this up, I'll be dead by time I'm thirty.

  Alright, so have you ever tried to open your iTunes, and you get something that says:

"iTunes has encountered a problem and needs to close.
We are sorry for the inconvenience."

   What the heck?  The stupid thing hasn't even opened, how can it close!?  Sometimes, I really hate computers.  So, now I'm being forced to listen to my new Innerpartysystem CD in Windows Media Player... Which is better than nothing, I s'pose.

   I'm running out of the scrumptious golden buttery popcorn pieces, guys... This depresses me.

   So (I start out with so a lot, don't I?) I had some new story ideas.  And because I love you guys (the few of you who actually read this, but are awesome nonetheless) I will share them with you.  Okay, here goes:

1st Idea: (Not my normal writing style)
-Girl
-Guy
-Girl loses fiancé in a car accident (collision, she was driving, she blames herself, etc.)
-Guy-has one of those 'doesn't-care-about-himself' attitudes
-A few years after car accident, Guy meets Girl
-Guy and Girl go out on a date
-Decide to start a relationship
-Girl falls for Guy
-Guy finds out it's his fault Girl's fiancé died (he was the other driver)
-Guy wants to tell Girl, but doesn't want to lose her, because he realizes he's falling for her
-Have some sort of fight, and Girl leaves (still not knowing about Guy and accident)
-Guy dies (not literally) in despair and leaves
-Girl finds out about accident some other way (not sure yet)
-Girl goes after Guy
-Girl tells Guy what she knows
-Guy thinks she'll hate him forever now
-Instead, Girl hugs him and blah blah blah
-They live happily ever after

Or something like that.  Yeah.

(Wow, now even Windows Media Player won't come up -_-)

Now, the second idea is more my style, but I don't know enough about it to tell you.  So, you'll have to wait.

RANDOM SUBJECT CHANGE

   There's something creepy going on with a guy I know.  Let's call him L.A.  There's something not quite right with him.  We used to be pretty good friends, but I kinda pushed him away 'cause he kept hitting on me, and such.  Well, he got upset, and wouldn't talk to me for awhile, then suddenly, everything was fine.  But lately, he's been... I can't even explain.  I don't want to sound all hippy-ish, but there's something messed up with his aura.  I suddenly feel very unsafe around him, almost like a rabbit hanging around with a fox.  A very big fox, that could crush that little girl rabbit as easily as one could destroy a flower.  A very big fox that could easily annihilate that little girl rabbit, even though the little girl rabbit is like, three years older than the fox.  You get the picture.
   On the surface, he's all smiles (especially now that he apparently has another crush on a girl, whom we'll call B)  This big fox, though, is a total player, and I don't trust him.  I'm nervous for B.  She's one of my friends, and I don't want anything to happen to her.  Even I have no clue what L.A.'s capable of, and I know-well, thought I knew-him pretty well.  And my other friend, Alice, had a really creepy dream with L.A. in it, and he kept hitting on her and stuff, and when I started talking to her about it (still in the dream) he got all mad and scary and... Yeah.
   I dunno, it just sets my nerves on edge when I'm around him.  It brings up that fight-or-flight instinct, and I keep having to push it back down.
   Something's not right...

I'm going to go.  I'll catch you guys later.  Hobey-ho.
This is Maximum Sunshine, signing off.  Αντίο και ο Θεός ταχύτητας.

Communicationally Deprived

   So, I have a problem:  I am without a cellular device.  See, my charger for it, decided to take a permanent vacation, and crapped out on me last night, so my phone went uncharged, and for those of you who know Scoops, their batteries tend to last hardly a day.  Especially when you live in the boonies with barely any service ever.  So, I decided, since it will probably be awhile before I have a phone again, and it'll probably be when I get a new one, I should write down all my numbers.  203 of them.  Yeah, try typing all those out with the names they belong to, without messing up, and before your already rapidly declining battery life craps out on you.  I got 12 before my phone took it's last breath... or rather, last buzz.  Talk about 'utter failure.'  Fortunately, my friend, whom we all call Young Matthew, (even though he's older than all of us) used to have a Scoop, so he's going to lend me his charger, until we get the Chocolate Touch I really want.

   Oh crap.  I just realized:  I forgot to bring my Spanish home, and it's due tomorrow.  Shiz-nit.  Well, I guess it's Encore for me tomorrow.  Yay.  Oh well.  Anyways, back to... Actually, on to something new.

   Conference Speech was today.  I really didn't have to go, because my duet partner and I were only alternates, so we didn't have to perform at all, yet we still had to go.  Well, I was all hyper, 'cause I didn't have to do a dang thing.  And I had Dr. Pepper... Don't judge me.  I needed caffeine.
   After I came back down from my caffeine high (it was combined with sleep-deprivation, which is a dangerous combo), I decided to take a nap.  Long story short, I was almost asleep, until some @$$hole started harassing me.  First he laid down way too close for comfort, then he went and laid his head on my stomach, and I got pissed, and then the whole speech team came to my rescue and chased him and his stupid friends away from me.  I don't like being touched by people I don't know... Guys I don't know...

   You know, I just thought of something:  I should start creating voice/video logs for journal entries.  That'd be really cool.  It'd probably be a lot funnier, too, because then you all would be able to see my reactions, like when I suddenly remember something.  Ha.  Just thinking about it makes me laugh.

   Well, I have a sketchbook assignment to finish.

   Hobey-ho, mates
This is Maximum Sunshine, signing off...  Αντίο και ο Θεός ταχύτητας.

V-Day, Reflection, and... Stress: A Sure Sign That I Am Going To Die Young

   My arm hurts.  Wanna know why?  Of course you don't, but I'm going to tell you anyway:  I'm stressed.  And when I'm stressed, I need to do something physical to let out all the steam.  This physical activity, which has my right arm sore as H-E-double-hockey-sticks, started out as lightly skipping stones across a miniature pond, and turned into launching fistfuls of rocks angrily at the water, then (because I didn't want to have to mow over all these rocks when the water disappeared) targeting the tree trunks on the outer edge of the woods, instead.  Sad thing is, I didn't even know I was stressed.  My simple, supposed-to-be-calming, rock-skipping activity turned into a full fledged attack on the trees and anything else I could hit (which, sadly, wasn't much).  I nearly started crying, and I don't even know why.  I guess I'm so stressed because of all the things coming up:  Speech meet this weekend, and my duet partner and I haven't practiced since the last speech meet, which was like, 3 weeks ago... Um, let's see... ACT Academy (class that helps you prepare for the ACT) starts on Monday and goes until April 5, then April 9 is the test day... Also, freakin' Talent Show tryouts are on Monday... Quizzes in Spanish and English tomorrow... Drama class crap to try and remember to get started on... Teachers witching about Girl's State and Law Cadet interviews, both of which I don't really have an interest in, even if it does look good on college applications... Geez, I'm going to have a meltdown just typing about all this stuff...
   I miss the summer.  Summertime is less stressful.  Sure, I have work, but at least the stress is kept down to minimum, there.  In school, it's an everyday occurrence.  However, I had a highlight to this week.  Lemme tell you about it...

   It was Monday, Valentine's Day.  Now, I know I said I hate Valentine's Day, but this one was different.  It was going pretty much like it goes every year:  I got a few candies from some friends, and then the Student Council members handed out the carnations that you could buy for other people, and I got one from Tanner.  The surprise didn't come 'till the last bell of the day rang, and I opened my locker.  There, sticking out of a vase in my backpack, was bouquet of seven roses; there were two white ones, two red ones, and three black/white ones, with unbloomed lilies mixed in, and what looked like tiny apple blossoms scattered all around in it.  A red envelope sat right next to it.  I opened it, and the first thing I see is the cover, which said: "If I had a flower for every time I thought of you, I could walk in my garden forever." A quote from Alfred Lord Tennyson.  Inside said, "What a perfect day for me to tell you I love you," plus a personal message from Tanner, but I'm not going to put that up on here.  Ah, excuse me, it's making me tear up again.
   Anyway, when I pulled out the bouquet and vase, and read the card, it made me want to cry, and when nobody was around, I did cry.  It was a mixture of sadness and happiness, but mostly happiness... I had never gotten roses before, except for one time, when my dad bought me a pretty yellow one... I was surprised to find the black roses in the bouquet.  It was only earlier that day, when Tanner and I were talking about flowers, that I mentioned I loved black roses.  Later on, I found out that he called and had the black roses added in.  He also said the lilies were supposed to be orchids, because I had once said I liked orchids, but they didn't have any... I can't believe he remembered that orchid thing... That was another thing that made me cry:  Nobody else ever remembers the little things I say... Like, that I like the color green, or I love orchids, or black roses... Or that I love the smell of books, the scent that their pages give off... Or that I hate coloring pictures that I draw, and I only like using pencils when I draw... Or that I was born at 12:17 am...that I like songs without words, and I like to create little movie scenes in my head to put with those songs... that I love water, but I'm scared of drowning, and I can't not hold my nose when I go underwater... not many people remember the little things... But Tanner does...

... This is Maximum Sunshine, signing off...  Αντίο και ο Θεός ταχύτητας...

V-Day, Why I Hate It, and the Weather

   Who here absolutely abhors Valentine's Day? -raises hand- I have a boyfriend, but I still don't like Valentine's Day... I may be a romantic, but V-Day is just an excuse for stalkers to openly chase after their stalkees, throwing candy at them and screaming "I love you!!!" (Why do I feel like I've written this before? 0.o)
   Anyway, the only reason I'm looking forward to V-Day is getting to hang out with Tanner.  Other than that... Valentine's Day sucks.  Especially for people who are single.  It gets kinda lonely.
   I never liked V-Day ever since, one time, I had the loneliest Valentine's Day any person could ever have.  Everybody was mad at me, I was very single, and the day just seemed all-around dreary.  Yeah, I could go into a lot of detail about it, but I'll spare you the sob-story.

   Has anyone been noticing the weather?  If you haven't, I'm ordering someone to smack you in the face with a frying pan.  It's friggin' gorgeous outside!  Today, after i shower and stuff like that, I'm going outside to finish my shield.  Maybe Tanner can come over and help me, or maybe I'll take it to his house and work on it.  Who knows.  I'm just excited because it's getting warmer!!  Soon, I'll get to break out the sunscreen! Woo!

   Alright, I'm going to see if I'm past my writing block, and maybe write a few pages, then take a shower and head outside.  Shut off your computers, get off your bums, and get outside!!!

And as D.J MacHale says:  Hobey-ho, mates.
This is Maximum Sunshine, signing off.  Αντίο και ο Θεός ταχύτητας.

Being A Wallflower...

   When you're with friends, you're supposed to feel like you're not alone anymore, right?  Then why is it, when I'm with my friends, I feel more alone than ever?  I say something, but nobody seems to hear me.  I could be talking to them, and someone else will say one word, and suddenly, it's like I'm not there anymore.  They act like I'm just... part of the wallpaper.  A wallflower.  That's what I've become to everyone, especially my friends.  The only person who is keeping me from losing it completely is Tanner.  He still sees me as human instead of wallpaper.
   I'm trying to mend things with Kelli.  But in that area, it seems I'm even more of a wallflower.  She doesn't want to be friends with me.  I don't blame her, actually.  After all, nobody wants to be friends with someone who you feel stole your best friend and changed him from how you knew him.
   Tanner and I's friends are like oil and water.  They won't mix.  My friends don't care much for his friends, and his don't care much for mine.

   Maybe I should just accept my fate.  Being a wallflower isn't so bad.  You become more observant, and I could use some work in the observatory-area.  It's a fact; the more people ignore you, the more you watch and listen, for the sole sake of finding a hint that they might stop ignoring you someday.  Usually, that which you hope doesn't happen, but you do sharpen your observation skills.

   Last night, I completely broke down.  See, I had spent the day at one of my friend's house, when, suddenly, she says they have to leave, for a Valentine's Day thing.  They won't be back 'till tomorrow, but they say I can stay at the house until someone comes to get me.  They tell me I can eat whatever I want, and watch movies 'till my ride comes.
   After they'd been gone for a few hours, I went to make myself a sandwich.  As I was putting mayo on some bread, I broke down, crying.  I couldn't even eat.  I paced in the kitchen, occasionally pounding weakly on the counter-top.  I was so tired of being left alone.
   Tanner had been texting me, asking me if I wanted to go with him over to a friend's house and watch a movie.  We ended up talking on the phone, and I was still crying and... yeah... not a good deal.

   I've recovered from my breakdown, thanks to my wonderful boyfriend... and coffee.

   Comment if you feel like you're turning into a wallflower.

This is Maximum Sunshine, signing off.  Αντίο και ο Θεός ταχύτητας.

Playing Catch Up...

   It's been awhile, my friends.  Sorry I haven't posted anything new lately.  The past few weeks have been uber busy, with speech and all these snow days.  Yeah, we just had another one today, the reason being it's too friggin' cold and windy.  It feels like 20 below (Sadly, this is not an exaggeration.  It's what they said on the weather report).  Wind-chill is 40 below, and tomorrow is only s'posed to get colder.  We already have a 10 o'clock start tomorrow, but I'm hoping it'll turn to no school, instead.
   I can't friggin' wait 'till spring rolls around, and everything starts to melt, re-forming the nice little creek that runs through my yard every year.  I'm even nostalgic for the sun.  Me.  The anti-sunshine-ist, longing for and lying in every scrap of sunlight I can find.  But lately, the sun has been making only scarce appearances, which sucks for my poor, always-cold self.  Sometimes, I swear ice runs through my veins.  My hands and feet are always as cold as Popsicles, and never seem to like to stay warm.

   So, I'll play a little catch-up and get you up-to-date on what's been happening in my world.  First of all, (I can't remember if I mentioned it already or not but) I am completely and irrevocably in love.  Enough said, because I doubt you want to read all about the gushy-mushiness of my love life.  So, moving one.
   Second of all, I have just realized (literally JUST realized) this is the first winter I have not been depressed.  I thank my boyfriend for that.
   Third, I'm pretty sure I don't like speech.  I'm not a very competitive person, unless it's a one-on-one thing, like boxing.  Other than that, my competitive stamina is at a zero.
   For about the fourth or fifth time, I am reading my favourite book, Sunshine by Robin McKinley.  Amazing book.  Just sayin'... Fun Fact: From this book is where I got the nickname "Sunshine."  That's the main character's nickname (pretty much her real name) and apparently I'm a lot like her.  Plus, that name for me is sort of an ironic antonym, or something like that, since, majority of the time, I don't like to be in the sun, and the character in the book is like, a sun freak.  Yeah.

   Anyway, not much else has been going on.  Its still friggin' cold, I still hate winter, I'm still madly in love with my boyfriend, and I'm still tired of school.  So, yeah.  No worries.  You haven't missed much.

   Well, my friends, I'm going to sit by the fire, drink my coffee, and read Sunshine.  I hope you have not missed me too much.  Stay warm!

This is Maximum Sunshine, signing off.  Αντίο και ο Θεός ταχύτητας.